Finally the day has arrived and you get to plan your big day! BUT brides-to-be, we want to give you a heads up, there are some things you just don’t expect… from wedding politics to invitation quandaries we will help you with our solutions!
1. Damn… Weddings Are Expensive
For those who have no idea, an average wedding in UK costs about £25,000! Traditions are long since dead Living with your fiancee before the big day is normal and gone are the days when parents would pay for a large share of your wedding. So open up your purse, you are footing the bill.
Weddings are expensive, the only way you can get away with it is to prioritize what is really important to you. If an ice cream cart is more important to you than kick ass bridesmaid’s dresses then budget accordingly. Maybe you don’t like cake? If it is ok with your guests have your wedding day during the week. There are many ways to save money on your big day.
Don’t forget, there is a silver lining to paying for your wedding and that is that it is a great reason to have a smaller and more intimate wedding with only your most beloved guests in attendance.
2. Bridesmaid’s drama!
The dreaded question: ‘Why is she a bridesmaid and I’m not?’ Trust me, I’ve been asked this question! You wouldn’t think people would have the nerve, right?
The best way is to tell her the reason why! This could be because she has not been a good friend lately, or that you feel you have drifted apart. Or maybe it is just that you two don’t live in the same city, which makes meeting regularly in relation to wedding planning and dress shopping difficult! I know it sounds confrontational but an honest answer goes further in life than a sugar coated half lie!
3. The Never-Ending Details
There are so many little things you need to think of! You want the napkin colour to match the rest of the colour scheme, are the flowers are too big for the venue or why are the place cards not matching the table numbers!?!? You constantly feel that you are forgetting something and that your planning is unfinished.
Get organised! Little thoughts are going to pop into your head throughout your day of things that you have forgotten or need to remember. Get into the habit of writing them down. A lot of brides get a little notebook which is a great idea, but it can be tricky always having it with you. We recommend Wunderlist! It is an app you can have on your phone and you can access it on your desktop or online. It is a simple to-do note application. Simple & easy to use and there is a super ‘ding!’ sound when you complete a task that gives you a nice sense of accomplishment. You can upload images, links and documents like supplier invoices really easily. Also share your lists with your fiancee/bridesmaids so you can work together. We sound biased but if it weren’t for Wunderlist Mission Tie the Knot probably wouldn’t exist!
4. Am I going insane? Why does no one get it?
No one seems to understand how hard it is to plan a wedding- until they have done it themselves. If you are one of the first of your friends to get married be prepared and expect your friends’ expressions to glaze over! It is difficult for bridesmaids, maids of honor and friends to understand why you are getting so stressed with your wedding planning if they have not been married before. You could also be going slightly mad with it all, so it may be a little of both!
Don’t forget why you are doing this. You are standing up and declaring your love in front of your friends and family- that’s it!
When your planning and worries get to be too much, take a step back and try to remember this. Try to regain a little of your sanity and gain some perspective. Instead of letting your wedmin run rampant over your life and you are only talking about wedding planning: compartmentalize! Set time aside every week, even if it is just an hour, your groom will prefer these short bursts of activity to constant wedding conversations. Trust us!
It may seem like the end of the world now if these details get forgotten, but trust me, on the day you won’t care! During my wedding we lost power to our venue when everyone sat down to dinner. The lights went out and no one even noticed.
4. Distant Relatives Mean More To Your Parents Than You Thought
It is wedding time so get ready for your distant relatives emerge out from nowhere! It is easy to forget that this day will mean almost as much to your parents as it does to you. That is why it is often a surprise when they desperately want some distant relative to attend your wedding. For them it is all about getting the whole family together.
Here comes the benefit to paying for your own wedding- you do it how you like (or you can at least try to!). Your parents won’t be able to exert as much influence over your big day if they are not contributing to it. But you need to decide on your happy mid-way point. You may find it easier to invite and pay for the Aunt that you haven’t seen since you were six rather that incur the wrath of the closer relative that is championing the invite. Is it worth battling over this until the big day? You may not even notice this person or you will be so happy that you won’t even care.
Frankly, this is a big topic so we shall be covering it in more detail soon! Follow us to hear more
5. My Fiancee Just Isn’t Interested
This sounds like a huge sweeping generalization, but bear with me.When planning my wedding there will be some things that you are not inspired by and the same thing with go for your fiancé.It can be tough motivating your partner and it can lead to you feeling alone.
I didn’t care about the transport for our guests but my fiancee really did. I have a friend who wasn’t interested at all in her bouquet or flowers but her fiancee did so he chose the flowers. Everyone likes different things and your wedding planning will go much easier if you acknowledge these likes and dislikes early, otherwise it is like flogging a dead horse!
After months of talking to my fiancee about his opinion on flowers and getting blank looks in return he turned to me and said ‘I’m sorry I just really don’t care about the flowers’ – at last an opinion I could work with!